So it has been quite the intense last couple of weeks. First I will sit here and tell you a little about myself. I’m 23 years old, gay, and searching for the love of my life (sadly through the internet). I am starting this in no attempt to get airtime or followers, but to just vent a little. If it’s been one thing in the last few weeks, it is exactly this: A BOY TORNADO
Guys are crazy, and many of them have been on my mind lately. 3 in particular. For the sake of privacy, I will call them JP, CC, and SD.
The past is the past. JP is a guy that a family member actually tried to introduce me to as soon as I got home from Chicago, which is another crazy story. We’ll get to that later maybe.. She’s also a little batshit crazy, but that’s not the point. This guy worked at a liquor store in Kalamazoo and my aunt gave him my number because she thought we would get along. It seemed like we were hitting it off through text messages and crazy calls throughout the night. The long nights of talking lasted for about 3 weeks. I have a problem with guys. This is that I can get way too attached without even knowing the person. It happens to me all the time. After a month of trying to get rides to Kzoo to go see him, I freaked out on him and told him that I didn’t feel like he was putting in the effort to come see me. I felt like all I was getting out of this meaningless banter was a tiny glimmer of hope that this long-distance thing could work out. Turned out that after I said how I felt, he ended with “yeah, this probably isn’t going to work.” This was a REAL low blow, and I just didn’t understand. All in all, guys can be douchebags, so don’t get too attached too soon. Even under the sexy snakebite liprings and cute selfie photos, guys can be jerks.
Then there is CC, who is the present. It’s not like I’m with him or anything, but I feel for some reason that there’s love there. The sad thing? It’s not mutual. 2 days ago, we decided to go swimming with my friend and it was actually a really good time! CC seemed to be having a really good time, so I took it upon myself to tell him that I am developing feelings for him. After I told him that “I had the most fun yesterday than I have in a while. And oh,that it’s inevitable to admit that I like you.” The response I get? Shit happens. Oh, shit happens? So I just kinda let it go. I woke up this morning and told him that I needed to know how he felt, too. So I texted him and he asked me what I meant. Long story short, he kinda broke my heart. It’s insane how easily I fall for a guy. I end up in the FriendZone WAY too much, and this is a problem. It was sad. He told me that he was more of a leather and tattoos kinda guy. By this point of the week/end, I had almost lost hope because not only did I feel like I could have lost a good friend, but I just didn’t, and still don’t, understand why guys are scared away so easily.
Then I met SD on OKCupid this past weekend, while enjoying a nice cottage getaway weekend with my father. I just randomly decided to reactivate my account on OKC and had a reply from an 89% match named SD. The initial talk was that we needed to give this a try, because it is obvious that we had a lot in common. With that being said, hopefully not too much. We talked until about 3 in the morning after he added and stalked my Facebook Page. SD seems like a really great guy. Ears gauged, great personality, gorgeous, all the things that seem right. And then… He asked me out on a date. We are going on a date tomorrow and I couldn’t be more excited. Netflix and beer at his place? Sounds like a perfect thing for me! I hope and pray that this post could be the last post while I’m single, but I’m not going to try to think that far ahead. He’s masculine (plus), he’s confident (HUGE plus), great hair, etc. etc. I could go on forever, but I’m just hoping it goes well or I don’t spill a beer on my shorts. Or maybe I do, so he could clean it off? Haha, okay, now my mind is just roaming. Could this amazing 22 year old OKCupid match be one made in heaven? I guess I will just have to wake up in the future tomorrow and figure it all out. I’m just gonna go with the flow. Oh, did I mention that SD is also in search for a soulmate?
So, we have a jerk from the near past, a good friend made in the present, and a very good opportunity tomorrow in the future. Wish me luck, Mr. Blog, as I hopefully embark on the most exciting date in 2 years.
With true love,
The Hopeless Romantic